We all know that horrible feeling of a weak handshake. (*shudders at the thought.)
But Good God Almighty is there anything worse than a weak cup of tea? This is often met with the refrain of ‘ Oh are ya having tea in your milk are ya?’ Bleurgh.
And then, THEN! The actual making of the tea itself.
The process, the ritual, the recipe of it all.
This has been the cause of debates and divorces.
Some say to heat the mug first with hot water.
Some say to put the tea bag in first.
Some say put in a little bit of water, then the teabag, then give it a good stir. Others say ‘SHHHCALD THE POT!’
(For those of you who are unfamiliar with the verb ‘ to shhhhhcald’ ; this means you put the hot water in the teapot, rinse it out, put the teabags, fill with hot water and then let it steep.)
But whatever you do, don’t let it stew too long. Oh no no no!
And then how about that other tea crime that occurs all too often?
Let us paint the picture:
It’s a Spring Day. You meet your pal for a cuppa and a chat. You innocently order tea.
Teapot arrives. You begin to pour. The tiny stainless steel teapot inexplicably spills tea everywhere. Every time. But you keep drinking that tea.
Because after all, there’s nothing better than drinking a big mug of tea and spilling the tea with your mate.
It’s quite drastically, but surely truly described in Irish: Marbh le tae agus marbh gan é - Dead with tea and dead without it.
So do you take your cupán taé?
